I hear it sometimes, still. I hear it in my sleep. I hear it when I linger at the grocery store. I hear it when I'm enjoying a cup of tea. I hear it when I'm playing. I used to hear it constantly. It is that voice, the one I long to banish. It's that voice that tells me who I can be, what I can do, how I should act. It is that sound, that noise in my mind, that limits me.
We have probably all held a voice like this in our minds, letting it control our actions and hold onto our fears. Newsflash-this voice serves no purpose except to cling to limitations. To push the voice away, to bury it, is to release the past. It means to open up a whole new world and let yourself be. How frightening this can seem. I choose to change that word: frightening. Instead, releasing that voice will be exhilarating! The release lets go of pain, fear, rejection.
In releasing this voice that holds us down, we give ourselves permission to be who we were meant to be. There is only one voice to be listened to-our own voice. Perhaps we haven't really heard our own voice since we were a little child. It is still there..it can sing again.
Today, I knew that voice, the one that haunted me in my sleep, was almost gone. I played some beautiful music, opened the windows, heard the birds singing..and I danced. I danced by myself. I closed my eyes and I listened. Then I slowly I began to hear it..the voice I had been waiting for-MY voice.
Monday, April 30, 2012
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
There Is No "fine.."
Thats it. Ive had it. The next person who tells me "you'll be fine" had better look out. Websters defines the word "fine" as-"very well." HUH? Who truly wants to be just fine? What a boring, bland word. Step it up, people!
Here's what I want to be..no, change that-here's what I WILL be-damn awesome! Now, there's a word..or :excellent, magnificent, amazing, great, superb..the list could go on. Haven't many of us stood on the sidelines for far too long being "fine"? I spent too many years languishing in the status quo, living in fear of a mistake if I stepped too far outside of "fine." It's time to embrace mistakes, glorious, life altering mistakes!
Is there a box to step out of? I dont think so, at least not for me..no box, no limits on where I can go, who I can be. We are all meant to do great things..who are we to settle for "fine?" There can be no settling, or else, what really is our purpose? Its time to stop playing small. The world has no time for smallness and limits, and neither do I!
"When you're always trying to conform to the norm, you lose your uniqueness, which can be the foundation for your greatness." Dale Archer
Here's what I want to be..no, change that-here's what I WILL be-damn awesome! Now, there's a word..or :excellent, magnificent, amazing, great, superb..the list could go on. Haven't many of us stood on the sidelines for far too long being "fine"? I spent too many years languishing in the status quo, living in fear of a mistake if I stepped too far outside of "fine." It's time to embrace mistakes, glorious, life altering mistakes!
Is there a box to step out of? I dont think so, at least not for me..no box, no limits on where I can go, who I can be. We are all meant to do great things..who are we to settle for "fine?" There can be no settling, or else, what really is our purpose? Its time to stop playing small. The world has no time for smallness and limits, and neither do I!
"When you're always trying to conform to the norm, you lose your uniqueness, which can be the foundation for your greatness." Dale Archer
Monday, April 23, 2012
Rejoice
Sunday came and went and renewed me..as it has done for the past several months. Previously, Sunday had been a day of dread, a day of guilt, a day that made me tired. Now it has become, for me, my favorite time. It is when I connect with people who lift me up, when I feel the Presence of the Divine..and in the process we lift the world up.
In this spiritual community I have found an openness and an acceptance that I had never experienced. There is no fear of who I am or where Ive been. We are all bound together, and in this place where voices sing, bodies dance and hands are clasped together, I have found a home.
When I washed up on the shores of this incredible place nestled in the mountains outside of Denver, I was amazed to realize that people like these were really here..they do exist! As I went about the business of making new friends, I have found that the people I am drawn to are the people I spend my Sundays with. They are laughter and joy and they celebrate life in the way we were intended to. After hours in this haven, I welcome the rest of my Sunday energized and ready to make a difference.
A couple quotes that led me to write todays post are written below..how true they are...
"Freedom lies in separating yourself from your story." Deepak Chopra
"You repossess your life when you laugh at the things that try to destroy you." Toni Morrison
AND..one of my all time favorites:
"Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize that there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you." Lao-tzu
I am blessed..
In this spiritual community I have found an openness and an acceptance that I had never experienced. There is no fear of who I am or where Ive been. We are all bound together, and in this place where voices sing, bodies dance and hands are clasped together, I have found a home.
When I washed up on the shores of this incredible place nestled in the mountains outside of Denver, I was amazed to realize that people like these were really here..they do exist! As I went about the business of making new friends, I have found that the people I am drawn to are the people I spend my Sundays with. They are laughter and joy and they celebrate life in the way we were intended to. After hours in this haven, I welcome the rest of my Sunday energized and ready to make a difference.
A couple quotes that led me to write todays post are written below..how true they are...
"Freedom lies in separating yourself from your story." Deepak Chopra
"You repossess your life when you laugh at the things that try to destroy you." Toni Morrison
AND..one of my all time favorites:
"Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize that there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you." Lao-tzu
I am blessed..
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Magnificence
I sit quietly, savoring my new morning ritual. I did not come by it easily. In fact, I fought it. Living for over two decades with a rock in my stomach does not bode well for relaxation. How often did I tell myself that, yes, I am relaxing? Perhaps I was sitting in the sun, enjoying a glass of wine. Maybe I was curled up on the sofa with a good book. But how wrong I was..for I never knew, as I lived with that rock, what quiet and relaxation really were.It took life changes.
It took training. It took the little voice in my head, that finally told me after 50 years of life, "you are important. Save yourself." Kind of sounds melodramatic. But, in reality, its not at all. Its plain and simple truth. Learning to be still, to be quiet, to reflect on the sounds I hear(or dont hear) has, quite literally, saved my life. Oh, Im not too good at it yet.
The first time I tried to meditate, to be still, I gave it 30 minutes. I felt as if my skin was crawling. How do people do this? The Dalai Lama meditates for six hours a day. SIX HOURS!! Ok, I dont aspire to BE the Dalai Lama or to meditate for six hours, but still....So now I try a two fold approach.
I wake up early(not a problem for an insomniac). I make tea..which is really much more relaxing than coffee. I open my window..and I listen. If its past 7 am, I will hear cars, yes. But I hear birds..and what I see..oh what I see. I see the Rocky Mountains, the grand and glorious mountains. The creation of this beauty was surely one of God's grandest moments. I sit quietly and I reflect on what I have..and express gratitude, even for the sounds of those cars as they hum down the highway. I have my phone off, tv off, computer off. At first this was a strange feeling, this disconnect. Now, it is simply beautiful. It is, almost always, the best part of my day.
We are here, simply, to be magnificent. To do this, we have to reflect on the magnificence of this world, the beauty we have been given. When the problems or the stresses of the week are weighing on me, this morning time gives me a chance to remember that this is all a part of my journey. It is all for my greater good..and I am blessed.
April 19, 2012
It took training. It took the little voice in my head, that finally told me after 50 years of life, "you are important. Save yourself." Kind of sounds melodramatic. But, in reality, its not at all. Its plain and simple truth. Learning to be still, to be quiet, to reflect on the sounds I hear(or dont hear) has, quite literally, saved my life. Oh, Im not too good at it yet.
The first time I tried to meditate, to be still, I gave it 30 minutes. I felt as if my skin was crawling. How do people do this? The Dalai Lama meditates for six hours a day. SIX HOURS!! Ok, I dont aspire to BE the Dalai Lama or to meditate for six hours, but still....So now I try a two fold approach.
I wake up early(not a problem for an insomniac). I make tea..which is really much more relaxing than coffee. I open my window..and I listen. If its past 7 am, I will hear cars, yes. But I hear birds..and what I see..oh what I see. I see the Rocky Mountains, the grand and glorious mountains. The creation of this beauty was surely one of God's grandest moments. I sit quietly and I reflect on what I have..and express gratitude, even for the sounds of those cars as they hum down the highway. I have my phone off, tv off, computer off. At first this was a strange feeling, this disconnect. Now, it is simply beautiful. It is, almost always, the best part of my day.
We are here, simply, to be magnificent. To do this, we have to reflect on the magnificence of this world, the beauty we have been given. When the problems or the stresses of the week are weighing on me, this morning time gives me a chance to remember that this is all a part of my journey. It is all for my greater good..and I am blessed.
April 19, 2012
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Beautiful Adventure is a new blog, created out of my desire to share my experiences in what became a crazy life, no holds barred. There has been joy and sadness, laughter and tears...but its been a "beautiful adventure."
What I have learned along the way is that it is ALL beautiful..that I have choices in creating an amazing future. Ive been inspired by people and places..Now, I want to share, to let others know that whatever it is they think about, dream about, cry and laugh about, they can have it..Its about stepping out of the comfort zone and living the best life we can.
Its still a long road, with many twists and turns. But with this wisdom I have been blessed with and a belief in the beauty of this life, there can be nothing holding me back. No regrets ever again. Its time to live!
What I have learned along the way is that it is ALL beautiful..that I have choices in creating an amazing future. Ive been inspired by people and places..Now, I want to share, to let others know that whatever it is they think about, dream about, cry and laugh about, they can have it..Its about stepping out of the comfort zone and living the best life we can.
Its still a long road, with many twists and turns. But with this wisdom I have been blessed with and a belief in the beauty of this life, there can be nothing holding me back. No regrets ever again. Its time to live!
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