Just One More Day…
Four years ago. August 18,
2012. The day is forever embedded in my memory. I received a message from North
Carolina, simple in its’ devastation: “Jennifer died.” I remember my scream. I remember my sobs and
my disbelief. Three months before, Jennifer had been diagnosed and now, just
like that, she was gone. I had a flight reserved for one week later to see her. It was
not to be.
I talk to Jennifer almost
every day. Sometimes, when I experience something funny or exciting, I tell
her. When I’m feeling down, I share with her. Jennifer was my rock, my friend,
my sister of my heart. We disagreed on
so many things..sometimes it was comical. But we shared a fierce loyalty and
love for many, many years.
Recently, I was discussing
Jennifer’s life with our third sister of the heart and she made a quiet
comment, “I wish we had just one more day with her.” Oh so do I. And so I have been thinking about
that wish for one more day. I thought about Jennifer’s life and her legacy and
her lessons. What would we do with one
more day?
So Jennifer, this is what I
thought about. The pain, the loss, your absence, have not eased even after four
years. I still struggle to make sense of it. I still cry when I think of you.
But I smile and laugh also. My heart still hurts..the missing you never goes
away. If we had just one more day, I
would live like you did. I would seize
this life like you showed us how to do, grabbing each day with every fiber of
your being. I would shout your lessons from every mountain..and I would tell
everyone this: you might have only one more day, so:
Ride that mechanical bull. Drink another margarita. Throw a bigger birthday party. Squeeze the limo
through the Krispy Kreme drive thru. Dress in silly costumes. Let the kids eat
ice cream for breakfast. Play one more game of water volleyball. Make snow
angels in the neighbors’ yard. Drink another bottle of Merlot in your lawn
chair. Play kickball until your sides hurt. Get a puppy, and then get another
puppy. Laugh until you cry. Go sledding with that bottle of Merlot. Open your heart to love and love so fiercely that no matter
what comes your way that love sustains you. Be a friend, through thick and
thin. Get mad, then forgive. Leave secret gifts just because. Be loyal. Watch
really bad movies really late at night. Wear flip flops; always wear flip flops.
Be scared and take the chance anyway. Risk
it all, for that one more day. Live big. Listen closely. Then sit for hours and
talk, just because you can.
And then, in that one more
day, when you’ve done all that, ride the mechanical bull one more time and
laugh until the day is over.
